I’m Legend.

foto0029
abandoned house

the truth about life is that it is like a zombie-horror larp, you have to survive. ON YOUR OWN. (Oz)

My name is Annabelle Clarice Ortiz, but everybody calls me Oz.
I’m 28.
This is my diary, I don’t know if someone will be able to read it, maybe it doesn’t really matter, it’s just a good thing to don’t go mad.
I wasn’t someone special, before.
I was a normal young girl that was trying to survive as she was able to do.
I’m survived for just two reasons: first of all, luck, I wasn’t in a big city, and second because I’m stronger than others.
Not in a physical way, there was a lot of people stronger than me in that meaning, I’m stronger inside, I’m not simple to scare, I’m able to be lucid in a tragic situation, and, most of all, I’m a woman, I’m trained by all my life long to protect myself by myself.
I’m a little trained in some martial arts and krav maga, I fought in a lot of scuffles, and I’m good with weapons….so, while other persons fell into panic and died, I was acting like I’m used to do: protect yourself and save your ass, see the problem, find a way to escape, survive.
So now I’m stuck in this tiny town and try to survive, every day of my life.
I found a place where to rest, it’s a basement with only a door, with iron grating, so walkers can’t come inside.

Never trust a sunny day in the park...
Never trust a sunny day in the park…

There is no warm water, no heater, but, by a miracle, elettricity and adsl are still up, so I can communicate a little with other persons.
In truth, with just 2 persons: my best friend and my sister.
They are both really far away.
I decided to join my sister, but she is abroad, I discovered that “they” are gathering people in a place near the highway, to evacuate the survivors.
I don’t like “they”.
I don’t know well who they are, soldiers, surely, people from gov, I don’t know, but they act like if survivors would their slaves.
I really hate them, but I need them.
They have trucks and weapons and supplies.
I’m studing them from distance.
They decide who can join the rescue program with a test, I stole one copy from a man’s discarted body, and I’m trying to figure out how make them like me.
But, most of all, when I’ll be on my way I don’t have intention to finish in one of their fucking camp, cleaning their shoes and saying “thanks sir” for everything.
Once I’ll be on my way I’ll find a way to steal a weapon and escape, better on my own than slave.

You fell save now, don't you?
You feel save now, don’t you?

I survived to a violent husband, sexual balckmails, scuffles, stab wounds, and a generic life fill fulled of assholes, I can survive this too, in the end it’s no so different from a horror-survival larp, the only different is that it’s true. This is life.
But the walkers are not so scary, I mean, for them you are food, nothing more, and they are stupid and slow….what differences with all the bosses of my life? Almost nothing, some had the same bad taste in clothes too, they only danger is that they are a lot, and everywhere, like before, so I can make it.
But to survive there are rules, very important rules; first of all, always first, the most important thing:

SAVE YOUR ASS

don’t be an hero, because nobody will be an hero for you, so, save your ass first.

Second rule: don’t trust anyone. Most of all the ones say you “you can trust me”. Never, never trust this people. They will betray you as soon as possible to save their asses, so, don’t be kind and charitable. I did this mistake and I almost died, so don’t be so stupid again.

Third: don’t be scared. This will keep you alive most of the time. Walkers are just walkers, they are stupid and slow, you can fight them, you can kill them. If you found yourself a weapon you have all you need to survive, you are fast, and can think creative, so, the victory is already yours.

Fourth: find yourself a weapon. This is not only about a real weapon, choose something strong inside you and use it as a weapon. Strenght, smarteness, velocity…whatever. Use your skills.

Walker
Walker

Last one: Find a way to don’t go mad. This situation sucks, I know, so you have to find a way to don’t go crazy. People die, the walkers are everywhere, you are alone and you can trust anyone, this should go crazy every human, so rest and find a way to survive.
I found mine: punk music and poetry.
And I pretend to be in a game all the time, so this doesn’t seem so horrible, at the opposite, almost funny. But remember: use all your creativity to survive this apocalyptic world.
If I will live, maybe, I’ll write again, for now it’s all….good luck to all of you.

Oz.

3 pensieri su “I’m Legend.

    1. Grazie Claudine, come al solito sei un tesoro…guarda, tutto è nato per casissimo da una serie di esperienze orrende che mi stanno rovinando la vita e che si sono concentrate tutte negli ultimi 3 giorni.
      Attualmente mi sento proprio tanto bloccata a una frontiera del niente, circondata da walkers….tradita dalle persone che credevo mi amassero, e quindi quando devo sopravvivere io scrivo e creo, è l’unica cosa che per un po’ mi libera dai demoni e mi aiuta a guardarli da una prospettiva meno spaventosa. è un po’ come se scrievendone, passandoli dalla mia testa al foglio, li rendessi meno “consistenti” e più battibili.
      Certo, per come sono fatta io sarebbe molto più facile piantare un pugnale in capoccia a uno zombie che combattere con la burocrazia italiana, ma riflettevo che le regole di base per la sopravvivenza sono circa sempre le stesse….e quindi è nata Oz :)

      Liked by 1 persona

      1. Questo non è il “luogo” adatto per lasciarti le mie impressioni… sappi che ognuno di noi ha un percorso karmico specifico… e questo muta, a dipendenza di molti fattori esogeni (poi nulla è dato al caso). Volentieri vorrei poter conoscere anche te, Elisa mi ha detto che forse quest’estate si organizzerà per trovarci. Mi puoi scrivere allo contact@travelclaudine.ch Aspetto sempre la tua offerta per Wiki :-)
        PS. si deve imparare a “lasciare andare” senza attaccamento, per far posto a qc. di nuovo. Se qc. ti volta le spalle, è perché il vostro percorso non deve più continuare sullo stesso sentiero! Pensaci…
        <3 sereno fine settimana :-)c

        Liked by 1 persona

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